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Heaven

God to Professional Athletes: Stop Pointing at Me

New declaration from The Almighty makes gesturing to Him on field a sin

Dec 17th, 2007 | Category: Heaven, Sports

HEAVEN – In a press release issued earlier this month, God declared that professional athletes in any sport who point or gesture in any way in His direction while on the field of play will be subject to the normal penalties for committing a sin. The policy seems to have been in the works for […]



Heavenly Greetings To Become More Blunt, Accurate

Dec 17th, 2007 | Category: Heaven

HEAVEN – Sources close to Jesus say the Lord has grown weary of greeting lukewarm Christians with the traditional “well done, thou good and faithful servant.” Christ was seen Monday rolling his eyes at new arrivals who filtered in after Hope Chapel’s bus crashed on its way to a Michael W. Smith concert in Temecula, […]